I came very close to failing someone who is important to me.
My mother called me yesterday morning to say she wasn't feeling well enough to watch the girls. She thought she had overdone it in the yard; her ribs, lat and shoulder muscles hurt when she took a deep breath. But then she also said that she was having chills and sweats. She was going to see if her regular physician was available and if not take herself to the walk-in. Did she need help? No. -stubborn old lady :} I jumped into the shower running over the options-take the girls with me to work, call the other grandma, husband takes a half day. My initial reaction was very self centered-how will I deal with my babysitter not being available? It did NOT even occur to me that I should help her. But-didn't she seem a little fuzzy on the phone? Didn't she have a history of NOT asking for help? (runs in the family!)
I did pull my head out of my ass long enough to make arrangements for the girls AND myself. Took Mom to the walk-in and got her settled in at the ICU for potential bacterial pneumonia and sepsis. It's too soon to know for sure, but I think she is going to be okay.
When I think about what a close call yesterday morning was I get chills. My frenetic self-centered life came very close to hurting someone I love.
7 comments:
I don't think you're self-centered, just busy. And don't kick yourself for what 'might have been'.
I'm glad things turned out ok and I hope your mom recovers soon.
Judy
You're way to hard on yourself. You responded as most working professional mothers would. Not everything in the world falls on your shoulders. Give yourself a break and reflect on the good things foe a change.
- your DH
Thanks Judy-she is feeling alot better today!
My DH--I will reflect on the good! As in whatcha making me for supper tonight?? :)
Kris
It sounds as if your instincts ultimately served you well in taking care of all of the human critters that are close to you.
Hey girl you did what you were supposed to do, in the order you were supposed to do them. You acted perfectly correct. You are a wonderful woman, so glad to know you are in the world. Peace for all
p.s. dh seems perfect too, lol
Sounds to me like you DID do what you should....you got her to the doctors,and everything is fine.
Take care of YOU too!
I agree with Judy, you've been busy - not willfully neglectful. You love your mother. And you did help her when she needed it most. Though I totally understand the feeling - it is scary to think of what might have been. I am glad to read that she is better today, and I'll think positive, strong thoughts for her recovery.
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