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Thursday, February 12, 2009

Nothing to Fear...

I have been walking around for a whole week with a gnawing ache in my belly, a tight chest and a sense of panic. That feeling of a large important deadline approaching and an impossible number of minutia which must all be accounted for. Now this IS a somewhat normal state for me in short bursts, but prolonged anxiety is really not me.

I believe I am freaking out over the prospect of really truly taking the plunge into voluntary simplicity. It scares the shit out of me sometimes, and other times it seems like the most sane thing in the whole world. With all the negative vibes out there about the economy and TEOTWAWKI and VGD (very great depression-thankyou meadowlark) I must be insane to throw away my cushy income, right? Or not. I had a talk with my business partner yesterday, about my expectations and plans once we move, thinking that would alleviate some of this turmoil. Or not. It's like I'm talking a foreign language to her. I guess I am.

A lot of this goes back to my sheople problem, I've dreamed of escaping the herd, I have a very good plan, but am worried about the execution. BAAAH!

Just a post-script: After reading through about a week of missed favorite blogs and some reflection I have decided to view that pit in my stomach as something else--excitement. The difference between fear and excitement is just point of view and attitude! K


ChristyACB said...

I can't imagine it NOT being a time of enormous stress. Change is scary...big change is terrifying like a visit from the Manson family!

You seem to have a good head on your shoulders and a real sense of the outcome and that puts you way ahead of the game, yes?

Looking forward to reading your journey. I'm scheduled to take the plunge in just under 3 years.

MeadowLark said...

I stole the term from somewhere in the blogosphere btw.

You know what they taught us in the Marine Corps? Everybody gets butterflies. The trick is to get them to fly in formation.

I'm one to talk since I'm not quitting anything or doing anything remotely risky, but I say JUMP!

Sending Peace your way.

fullfreezer said...

I think anxiety is 'normal' in your situation (Whatever normal is- I think it's a setting on my washer) I am SO excited for you, though! and a little jealous. We're still in holding pattern here. I'll live the adventure vicariously through you until we can take the plunge ourselves.

Gina said...

I totally got your "foriegn language" comment!! I often feel I am the only one that speaks that language here too!

Ruralrose said...

Hi there - first time to your blog - couldn't pass without leaving you some encouragement. My husband and son and I took the plunge 10 years ago. We are safe, secure, peaceful and happy and you will be too. Let the adventure begin!! Peace